oh geez i took a depression test and my results were: "Your answers show the presence of prominent depressive symptoms. It is advised to seek a psychiatric consultation" no really? who would have ever thought of that? hmmm...
so said lynne at 11:11 PM [say something yourself]

aaargh i am going to go insane! first of all i don't know why i'm writing this since you know, my server isn't working STILL so nobody can read this and i can't even ftp it....but i am writing it. so deal. second, my computer absolutely hates me. okay, i got offline at twenty of ten because my sister was supposed to call. she didn't call until ten. and then my mum sat on the phone with her for a while, and then they finally hang up and i jump online. only thing is, aol DOES NOT WORK. i try for about a half hour before i can get on and stay on. grrrr....

and i have sat's tomorrow. i need to vent so much and i don't want to take them and AAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need to scream. seriously. i tried venting by hitting the computer desk/mouse/keyboard a lot but that didn't help any matters at all. ggggrrrrrrrrrr tomorrow is not a good day to take the sat's. oh well at least it's only my first time so i can take them plenty of other times (and probably will). but still...i don't want to take them at all. i should just drop out of high school right now. get my ged. and stuff. yep that sounds like a plan to me.
so said lynne at 10:49 PM [say something yourself]

please excuse me while i KICK MY SERVER'S ARSE!

aaaargh why is the internet not working today? it's so frustrating, seriously!
so said lynne at 6:18 PM [say something yourself]

hm...having no buddy list is very interesting. but still, i'd like to be able to see if beth or raft-boy are online. GIVE ME MY BUDDY LIST!!!! i can't even sign onto aim...
so said lynne at 5:39 PM [say something yourself]

*much* better.

i have sat's tomorrow. i do not want to take them. at all. can i just get that point across? i want to go back to school, though. so i can watch volleyball practice because it's fun. [g] i told my mum to pick me up later than she usually does on friday (which is supposed to be two but is any time between then and three) and she comes at 2:08. grrr....
so said lynne at 2:32 PM [say something yourself]

grrr....
so said lynne at 2:26 PM [say something yourself]

okay, why is blogger not posting my stuff? i thought it was fixed...
so said lynne at 2:22 PM [say something yourself]

haha i'm in the computer lab during english class again. [g] because we have a sub and we're supposed to be working on these papers for the great gatsby but we (katie and i) already did them so we asked to come down here. so here we are.

since blogger was down for a wicked long time last night (even this morning before school and during computer graphics second period!) i updated my diary. yep. and...i'm going to go show katie my webpage now. bye. [g]
so said lynne at 12:45 PM [say something yourself]

haha, i just went to get my lunch from the fridge and there are two sandwiches. one has a piece of paper with "history book" written on it, the other has "paul's wallet". i'm glad my mum finally figured out how to remind us to bring our stuff to school. i took the history book one, by the way. and i actually had remembered it before i saw the note.

it's right before school...my hair's doing a weird flippy-thing but that's okay, i kind of like it. hmm what else? nothing, really. time to go check people's blogs!
so said lynne at 6:27 AM [say something yourself]

i'm bored. i wish i had adobe illustrator on this computer so i could work on my computer graphics project. [g] okay, we started it today, and i'm already halfway done. it's not due for...well, there's no specific due date yet, but it won't be for a few weeks. and i'm halfway done. ha. why is it that every other art class i've ever taken, i'm always so behind, but i'm uncompatible with computers and this is the one class i'm so far ahead in? it's not even because i have study, because i've only gone down to the computer lab twice during study (and the other time, the computers weren't even working so i spent the entire period in the sculpture room with nate)...things just don't make sense in my life.

speaking of my life, i was bored so i typed up a summary of it. it's not always pretty, and it's not entertaining, but it's me. woo.
so said lynne at 8:28 PM [say something yourself]

very bored very bored very bored very very very very very bored...

today i imed jamie asking her how the concert was and she was like, "umm what concert?" because apparently the spacehog concert is this saturday and i am an idiot because i thought it was last weekend and i felt really stupid but that's okay and wow this is a run-on sentence. *breathes* anyway...

yesterday after school, brian and i were walking around (looking for a paper he needs for band that he lost) and we went into his english room. well, there were a bunch of papers on the desk and the top one happened to be an attendance list from a couple weeks ago. i saw raft-boy's name, so you know what i did? i stole the paper. i am so pathetic. [g] but if i was a sophomore, i would so be in his homeroom. it's not fair! why couldn't i have failed kindergarten or something? grrr...

but it says that his middle name starts with an h. what could that be? i was thinking of it. hecubus! i would die if his middle name was hecubus. [g] but it's probably something normal like harold or herbert (we were talking about that name in spanish today). oh well. i can pretend it's hecubus, right? [g]

i was watching The 60s on vh1 (i've seen it a million times but i don't care) and i came on here during the last five minutes and apparently my brother has some kind of radar or something because he always knows when i go on the computer. well, he came out here and changed the channel! so i didn't get to see the very end. awww...

ooh! placebo's on a commercial...i made my brother shut up as i listened. it's not like i don't have the song on cd or anything...[g]

let me just express my love for tall guy. i love him. okay, i'm done. [g]

speaking of tall guys, i met one today. he was cute (but not extremely scrawny...). he moved here a few months ago and all my friends had chorus with him so i was constantly hearing about him, but i'd never seen him. and then he was number two on my "data match" and he was my most astrologically compatible, so i asked who he was and everyone was like, "oh, he's a guy in chorus who's really tall and cute." so i was like, "i have to meet this guy!" he sings? and is tall? please excuse me while i JUMP ON HIM. [g]

but...i met him today. he was in the auditorium with emily and i after school (she was playing the piano, we do this every day after school) but at first i didn't know who he was and then when i found out it would have been even weirder to jump on him. [g]

and...those are my stories for today. yep. i'll shut up now.
so said lynne at 7:23 PM [say something yourself]

i can't go to church tonight. at least, that's how it's looking right now. because my mum's supposed to go to the middle school after she gets out of work. grrr...the middle school should just go away. nobody learns anything in it, anyway, what's the point?

maybe i should call up raft-boy's father and ask for a ride. [g] too bad i don't know the number. phone books are good for that reason, though. hm...

i'm tired again. i was watching clue on comedy central but almost fell asleep so i gave up on that. why am i so tired lately? it doesn't make sense at all. it's not fair.

i have study again tomorrow. maybe i'll go down to computer graphics again and work on my project. ha, i spend so much time down there, it's probably pathetic but i don't care. today, i spent three periods (2, 4, and 6) down there. because i was there for the class, then i went down during study, and then during english. but i have a quiz in english so i can't go down there again. too bad. i like randomly walking by raft-boy's class and seeing him bored out of his mind. [g]

it's been over six months since i've known him now...six months and almost three hours. and six months and two hours since he first talked to me. i miss those days a lot. [g] he should go to church tonight. or next week, since i can't go tonight...i'd be so extremely mad if he actually did go tonight and i didn't. feel the rage.
so said lynne at 4:32 PM [say something yourself]

haha, i know how to beat the system. see, i'm *supposed* to be in english class right now. we're working in the writing lab, on a rubric. i finished mine yesterday, so i asked the teacher if i could come down to the computer lab to work on my computer graphics project. since all my teachers love me (the feeling isn't always mutual) she trusts me and let me come down here. so i'm sitting in this room all alone and it's fun. i actually was working on my computer graphics project (i'm designing a brochure for the met) but i got bored and decided to see if i could update from here. because i can't view anyone's webpages because of the stupid block thing. my brother knows how to override it at the middle school. he's such a hacker. [g] but anyway, to make a short story even shorter, i can get into this. yay.

you know what? today, i was down here during fourth period (instead of study...i live my life in the art wing, seriously) and after, i followed raft-boy to his next class and he didn't even notice! how inconsiderate is that? [g] i always notice when he's behind me...well, because i'm constantly turning around because i'm paranoid he'll be walking right behind me when i'm talking about him (and he usually is), but still...

this has been a fun waste of time. now back to my project...
so said lynne at 12:34 PM [say something yourself]

good, now it's working. blogger randomly stole my archives again. evil blogger.
so said lynne at 9:55 PM [say something yourself]

testing...
so said lynne at 9:47 PM [say something yourself]

i am so bored...and tired. what is this? i don't understand at all. i need a vacation, seriously. (yes, i realise that we just had one, but i need another one.) but not really because my history report's due the day after we get back from vacation. grrr. i should probably get started on the book, since the report's due in four weeks or something like that...ha.
so said lynne at 9:28 PM [say something yourself]

more snippets of my conversations concerning telling raft-boy's father i'm going to marry him:

beth: maybe his dad would just be like "Oh do you? that's great! Let's go tell raft-boy!!" or maybe not... [g]
me: he probably would!
beth: yeah cause his dad is cool like that
me: his dad is so awesome. if he were raft-boy, i'd marry him in a minute [g]
me (after a pause): which...probably *isn't* a good thing to admit

heehee...
so said lynne at 8:56 PM [say something yourself]

okay, so i cannot figure this out. i went to bed earlier than usual last night (twenty minutes or so), slept five minutes late this morning, did not have a stressful day at all...and yet i'm still exhausted when i come home and have to take a two-hour nap. what is wrong with me?

i'm pretty sure my mum wonders why my computer is constantly mooing. it's fun. [g]
so said lynne at 8:45 PM [say something yourself]

days in which i barely get to see raft-boy suck. oh yes.
so said lynne at 6:46 PM [say something yourself]

i have a huge headache. maybe next time when i take a nap, i shouldn't have my stereo blasting right next to my head. hmm...
so said lynne at 6:39 PM [say something yourself]

okay so i was looking at my webpage, and noticed that there is something very important in my life missing on it. art. i have no section dedicated to art. and yet, it is the one thing (besides raft-boy) that gets me through school. how can i be so neglectful? expect a section dedicated to raphael in the next year. [g]

i seriously love that guy...yes, i'm talking about raphael. so what if he's been dead for hundreds of years (481 to be exact)? does that really matter? okay, maybe it does...but i don't care. i'm like that girl in ten things i hate about you who's in love with william shakespeare. only, raphael could kick shakespeare's arse any day. woo! [g]

i think i need sleep...
so said lynne at 10:02 PM [say something yourself]

okay now i just turned around and was like, "he looks familiar. what's he from?" and my mum's like, "he's from this movie..." i swear i've never seen this movie before! ...or have i? [g]

oh, the movie's south pacific and it's the premiere of the remake or something so i obviously haven't seen this version of it...i don't think i've seen any version. but why is it so familiar?
so said lynne at 9:37 PM [say something yourself]

watch as the reading list to the side magically grows every day...haha. [g] it'll change every day during the summer, i swear. but as for right now...it's just going to keep growing. yep.
so said lynne at 9:35 PM [say something yourself]

okay, i also know this song...but i know i've never seen this movie before! it's driving me insane...

in other news, i have a question, and i want everyone to answer it honestly. how crazy would i be to tell raft-boy (or even his father) that i'm going to marry him? [g] the crazier thing is, i can actually see myself doing it...i am such a psycho. but come on, i know there must be other people who have wanted to throw all caution aside and just act like a fool. right? please, someone, back me up on this. [g]
so said lynne at 9:29 PM [say something yourself]

haha! okay my mum's still watching her movie and they started singing and i spin around and am like, "i know this song! what's it from?" and she's just like, "this movie...?" and of course i deny that. [g] but i'm serious...i know it from somewhere else. don't i? i don't know anymore. [g]
so said lynne at 9:25 PM [say something yourself]

an actual conversation:
me: i think i'm going to tell raft-boy's father that i'm going to marry him
beth: hahaha...are you?
me: no...i just wanted to see what your reaction would be [g]

but...i wonder. what could really go wrong if i told his father that? he'd...think i was insane. so? everyone already knows that. what else? he might tell raft-boy and make him stay away from me (although i doubt he would do that because he's cool). so? raft-boy already avoids me like crazy. raft-boy might give me strange looks when he can't manage to avoid me. oh wait, he already does that...[g]
so said lynne at 9:04 PM [say something yourself]

haha, my mum's watching this romantic scene in a movie with singing and everything, and all of a sudden...."MOO!" haha it cracked me up. (that was my computer, by the way, telling me that raft-boy had come on. [g]) ...did anyone else find it hilarious? i guess you had to be there.
so said lynne at 8:35 PM [say something yourself]

i just watched pretty in pink...again. [g] well, i didn't finish it (i just stopped it at the end of duckie's lovely "performance" in the record shop, it was great) but...okay, i was *looking* for the smiths poster, and i still managed to miss it! i did, however, see a record-marker (you know, those things they put between them to mark off where the records are...) that said "smiths" on it. along with omd. [g]

i have sat's this saturday...i really don't want to take them. i don't want to start the process of becoming a seniour. at all. i seriously want to fail this year so i don't have to be a seniour next year. well, for two reasons. that, and so i can be in raft-boy's class. [g]

anyway, back to pretty in pink (my mind keeps wandering today). duckie is such a dork. i can't help but love him. i wish someone was that crazy about me. i'm almost that crazy about raft-boy. but not quite...i mean, i don't go telling his father that i'm going to marry him! (raft-boy, not his father [g]) although...i easily could. i have the opportunity. it would just seem very random. [g]

and...blaine is so gorgeous. i can't help it. especially in that one scene in the record store...i seriously just kept rewinding it. it's so...beautiful. i just watch it and giggle and go "awww" and i feel extremely like a school girl but i don't care.

oh, last night i was looking for something to watch and came across fresh horses on "women's entertainment" (i still can't think of it as anything except the romance channel) and it had andrew mccarthy and molly ringwald in it, and they're so cute together! but i only saw the last forty-five minutes, but not even because i wasn't paying attention half the time (i was blasting where is my mind and singing along while running through the house [g]). but the ending upset me. it wasn't extremely happy. it was...okay. but it wasn't the ending i wanted (and we all know that's all that matters, right?). uh-huh.

okay, so simple things really amuse me greatly. my mum bought coke bottles, they're actual bottles. you know, the glass ones. i love them. i have no clue where she found them, but i want more. i couldn't get over the fact that i was drinking coke out of an actual bottle. haha...and then i made noise with it and scared jewel. ha. [g]

my sister's going to california on friday...i am very jealous. but you know what? there's a very very slight possibility that beth might come up this summer. it probably won't happen, but if it does, it'll be in august. for the teen idols concert that's in rhode island. so i told her that if she does come up here, she'll have to come with me so she can meet raft-boy. or rather, she can watch him because i doubt i'd be able to introduce her...[g]

wow, i'm really rambling tonight. sorry. [g]
so said lynne at 8:04 PM [say something yourself]

today in spanish we had to think of an american who represented america...and i was paired with nate and we couldn't think of anyone. everyone we thought of wasn't from america. [g] you know you're an anglophile when...
so said lynne at 4:56 PM [say something yourself]

okay, has anyone seen say it isn't so? because at one point, they play "here comes your man" and i couldn't figure out if it was the pixies or samiam's cover of it. because they only played a little clip of it. and jenna and i always stay until the end of the credits (because there are always songs i want to check out...[g]) but we didn't because she wanted to go to the food court and get a drink before my mum came to pick me up...but she ended up not going anyway. bah. so anyway, i was wondering whose version of the song it was. it sounded like samiam's version, but i haven't actually heard the original so i don't know how true to it it is...yeah.

and i actually did write my essay last night. and it took my computer as long to print it out as it did to type it. i'm serious, my computer would print a line, stop for half a minute, print another line, stop...i don't know why it's doing this. it's a brand new printer, too. grr...
so said lynne at 4:52 PM [say something yourself]

essay progress: i have an outline! well...sort of...i have five things to discuss: brutality of assassination, how everything was shown realistically, the program followed all events, showed how life happened during that weekend, and it casually forgot j.d.tippet (horrible!). it's on the kennedy assassination, by the way. well, this thing we watched in history class about it. yeah. whatever. i'm sure you all care so much anyway. [g]
so said lynne at 9:51 PM [say something yourself]

haha i finally figured out how to get the actual smilie faces in ims, instead of just the : ) and stuff...and i also found where to get a buddy icon! this is awesome...[g] i get so amused by simple things.

essay progress: i have the title. "four days in november". woo.
so said lynne at 9:21 PM [say something yourself]

okay so i took out the history essay...and i am stumped. i have absolutely no clue what to write. i probably should have started it more than ten hours before it's due...i wish erica was online.
so said lynne at 9:15 PM [say something yourself]

well then, i'm so glad my computer likes to WORK.

yes, i am aware that it not working is probably it subtly telling me to go work on my history essay. i don't care.
so said lynne at 9:02 PM [say something yourself]

i should really write my history essay. i'm such a slacker, really. i have absolutely no idea how i keep my grades up.

but...in other news, i got 6.0 to work! okay, so i had to reinstall the entire thing, but oh well. it works now, that's good enough for me.
so said lynne at 8:05 PM [say something yourself]

jamie won tickets to see spacehog and buckcherry! (i feel the need to exclaim this for her since she no longer has a webpage.) can everyone just feel my jealousy?

today, i was putting off writing a history essay (again, but i doubt a "blizzard" is going to help me on this one) and waiting for jenna to call (she said she'd be home in a half hour and i called an hour later and she's not there still...we're supposed to go to the movies) so i made a list of confusing things raft-boy does. i'd write them on here, but it would take too much room and i'm not motivated enough. [g]

so yeah, i'm supposed to go to the movies today with jenna. to see say it isn't so. which will be our first time legally going to see an r rated movie. since i have no money, i thought this was a bit of a problem. but i was lucky enough to find four dollars in change (the movie's six dollars until six, and it's at four), including one dollar completely of pennies (ha), and jenna said she'd pay two dollars for me since i let her borrow money at spotlight and stuff all the time. so...she just needs to get home now. grr...
so said lynne at 2:59 PM [say something yourself]

hm...i have a feeling my computer's going to crash sometime soon. it hasn't since january, so it's about time. so if i don't update for a while...that's why.
so said lynne at 12:08 PM [say something yourself]

aaaargh my computer's being completely stupid and my brother's being even stupider. first of all, aol 6.0 won't work, the loading page comes up and freezes at "starting aol". so i'm stuck on 5.0 and for some reason on here, the blogger page wouldn't come up until just now...and my brother's done stupid things to 5.0 so everything is weird and i don't like it.

and then he's sitting there "watching" tv with his friend (who just left thankfully) but really watching everything i'm doing on here: "why are you on that page?" "why do you want to go on rapigator?" blah blah blah...he is so annoying!

and i can't even connect to things on rapigator...i'm trying to look for this one pavement song, i only have a little clip of it from amazon.com but i want the whole thing. and it's not on napster because nobody's ever on napster anymore. but i can't connect to rapigator to look for it on there...everything's annoying me today so much!
so said lynne at 11:53 AM [say something yourself]